Merry Christmas! Happy New Year! Happy Valentines Day and St. Patricks Day!      

So, pretty much if there was ever a bigger slacker or procrastinator in the last year other than me, I would love to meet him/her. It's now March. March 2013..., which means I missed the whole "New Years Resolution" movement, and so on. And no, I did not send Christmas letter this last year...or even for 2011. I have yet again, whirled through another year without looking back. Not only that, but I am a year older and crankier, and I have to spend a lot more time and money trying to look NOT old and crankier. I seem to have mastered the art of justifying anything by saying ''I'm just so busy" "I'll catch up soon" We'll slow down next month" or "YOLO" (my kids favorite saying these days of You Only Live Once). Seems I've taken this YOLO credo straight to the heart. A couple of years ago, I decided to stop being a YES person, and become a NO (or MAYBE) person.(see Christmas 2009 letter) Meaning. I am no longer ALL about pleasing others and what they want/expect from me, but I am going to get in touch with the deepest needs an desires in my own heart. No more Team Mom, Class Mom, or Tuesday night Jewelry party or Baby Shower attendee. So, I've sort of spent the last year or so being footloose and fancy free...and well, let's just admit it, selfish on the social front.(I think they actually call this "Real Housewives Syndrome")

                                (this is what people look like when they stop caring what others think)

I had big plans for these deep desires and new convictions, and I was convinced they would be monumental.. and change my overall feeling of discontentment with the choices I had been making. But a funny thing happened along the way... The more I said NO the more I wanted to say YES.  I think they forget to tell you when you are an only child, that we also harbor massive amounts of guilt.. pretty much for every decision we make. Naturally, this is because we are born so perfect, that every step forward is actually 5 steps back, even if it takes us this long to realize it. Really, it comes down to the fact that every day I've been trying to figure out where I can take that step that will REALLY be forward and not send me back. I've immersed myself in my children's lives, a new sport, a new outlook on my career...and for some reason I keep ending up back at the beginning of my journey. My heart not full enough to move on... my brain and body too bored to even keep up. How did I get to this point?! Easy. Kids.

(what I deal with on a pretty regular basis...)

 (these are the people I've been working for)


 I'm not blaming them, because I literally gave up most of my adult life to make them the best people I could to contribute to this human race, and they've filled my heart with a love I never thought was possible.  BUT on the flip side.. I've gone brain dead. In my mind I've done an above adequate job molding these little people into super cool big people, and I'm really proud. I'm also really really honored to be their friend and trusted cool mom. ("If mom didn't wear her ring, dad, someone else would ask her out on a date!")  And finding the amazing reasons I'm so in love with my marriage and husband.  But there is always that little voice that is screaming at me... "Hey you! Move on! Get your own life!"  I know I'm not the only mom out there wasting her degree, talents and  left over fancy resume. Fact is... they move on, and we don't.

In October, my babies turned 12 years old. That's like teenager to me, and I also know what I did when I was 12 years old. Yikes. (I also can't use, "I just had twins" anymore)  My oldest is now well into year 15...and ready to be sitting behind a steering wheel now. (Seriously new meaning to "Living on a Prayer") My most fulfilling and important job is now sort of only needing me on a part time basis. Granted, the job description is changing, it's shoving me into a different direction, pointing toward a vast deep dark black hole that I'm not sure has a safety net.  Families evolve, friendships change, relationships end, and in the end, it's just you, yourself and you. Well, and God, Buddah, or Yoga, or maybe just Ice Cream and Chardonnay. So, I'm not really sure of my point. Or how to start on end this journey/discovery. All I know is that I'm looking for a way that I can make my  kids, my husband, my family, my friends... and most of all, myself proud.  So, once again, I will start (continue!)  another year saying that this year I will figure it out. But this year, I will figure it out. Really.

                                                         (I'm pretty proud of this team!)

Merry Christmas 2010

Merry Christmas!

I'm wondering how in the world the last year has zoomed by once again, without my paying any attention! It seems that the holiday season sneaks up each year a little bit sooner with a little less warning. As with last year, I've decided not to "publish" a letter, but will post in on our family blog. (which obviously has been a little neglected this year, as with many other things!)

Our year has been busy, to say the least, but has left us with many sweet memories. We began this year with heartbreak with the loss of TJ's maternal Grandmother and then three weeks later, the loss of his paternal Grandfather. These losses came much to close to the losses of his other Grandmother and Grandfather just the previous year. We miss them all every day of our lives and know that they are so proud of their families.

As a family we were able to travel a bit this year and took our first official ski trip in February. We had our annual family camping trip with my family in June, where we hiked and explored Glenwood and Aspen. We also moved TJ's mother, Janet, from Palmer Lake to Ruidoso, NM in June, where she has made a new home. The Crowsons were also lucky enough to be invited back to Lake Powell in July with our neighbors and we think we've secured our spot for years to come, mainly by proving that we are very useful and entertaining campers. (and we've been dominating the Annual Family Olympics, just sayin). In October we spent Fall Break in Austin, TX with TJ's sister and brother in law, Jaree and Walker. We packed in a trip to San Antonio, the Natural Caverns, a BBQ Tour, a UT tour and Game and a lot of local Austin flair into our week long stay. We also met our new furry nepehew/cousin, Roux Fuss the dog.

Reed is somewhere between boy and man as he entered his 13th year. We celebrated his birthday by sending a group of boys in a limo for the afternoon, leaving the limo driver totally in control of 10 teenage boys. God Bless him. Reed started Junior High with a great attitude and played quarterback on the school's flag football team. He is also studying at an advanced level and has just been accepted to join the National Junior Honor Society. It's hard to not brag about his first semester with nothing but A's... He is also playing competitive basketball for the High School's feeder team and other rec leagues year round.

At 10, Jett is an avid reader and loves math. He seems to have a book in his hand at all times and we have to remind him to NOT read. He still loves to build and find out how things work...and create new inventions and drawings. He was on the school's stagecrew again helping to produce the talent show. He is playing basketball year round and some fierce defense on the flag football teams. One of our favorite times with Jett each day is around the dinner table...or any table where there is food, as mealtime seems to bring out his inner comic and critic. I've also seen an inner-wrestler trying to come out this year as well.

Brady, like all 10 year old boys, loves to MOVE. And TALK. He also loves math and reads just as much as Reed and Jett do. Its very fun to watch Brady become consumed by a book. He just eats the pages up! He is also playing basketball yearround, flag football and has stuck with soccer showing a new passion and talent. One thing we can say for that little dude is that he will risk life and limb to make a play in any of the games he shows up for! He has spent the year with a mouth of braces, and just got them taken off in time for Christmas. Brady also works the stagecrew for the school talent show, pridefully working the concessions stand! I'm not sure why he is not ON the stage, as he is quite dramatic... and I have NO idea where he got that from!!!?

TJ and I both celebrated our 40th birthdays this year, as well as our 15th wedding anniversary. I may have not welcomed the birthday as easily as TJ did, but I definitely made my mark! It's not so much that I've been worried about the actual age of 40, but I think I've used it as a defining moment to complete, or begin, some of the "bucket list." We threw a party in June to celebrate the big 40/40/15...and we were overwhelmed with the amount of friends and famiy who celebrated with us all year long, actually. TJ and I were also able to take some couple time to New York City in May and Vegas in September and San Francisco in November. We've definitely spent some time traveling this year! My business had a great year, where we packed 12 weddings/events into a 10 week work year!! I saw Steamboat, Beaver Creek, Keystone and Costa Rica...where I spent a week alone relying on my Spanglish and "wedding spanish!" We were also nominated for an award for one of our weddings that we planned last year and enjoyed the attention that came with the nomination! Mountain Occasions is growing and I'm looking forward to another great year. I've also still been busy year round on the tennis courts...wondering just when I will perfect the game....In my "spare" time I am constantly making lists and plans and trying to keep them all straight in my position as Household CEO (AKA: QUEEN).

TJ is busy with eCollege and added another responsibility to his legal position by taking on more of a managerial position running the partnership program and the development group. He is also still active playing basketball 2-3 times a week and keeping his bod buff in the gym. He is also much to my delight, still happy and handy in the kitchen a few days a week. (keeping me in the gym) In all that spare time he has (ha ha) he is still coaching Jett and Brady's basketball teams and playing, playing, playing with all those boys.

So, as the year comes to an end, we once again give thanks for all of the many blessings and gifts that we have been given. Great friends and loving family and happy, healthy bodies and hearts.

May this season find you and your family happy and healthy, as well. Cheers to the new year and all it's promise it holds. May you find laughter and love in each day!

xoxo,
Kret and the Boyz (aka: TEAM CROWSON!)

My Daily Ommmm

I get this daily email from a site called, the Daily OM. Okay, a little hokey maybe, but every day I get these little bursts of insight in my inbox that actually have a little meaning and relevance to my every day life. They are not religous really, but more like a self reverence, or in my case, quite often... an "A-HA!" moment.

My every day life seems to move by much too quickly and I rarely take a moment to reflect on anything that is self improving or self reflective. I wake up each day and pretty much follow my same daily routine. My morning routine, in additon to the family and kid preparations, includes a moment to make my bible for the day, AKA: The Daily "To Do" List. I list all sorts of things on this list. I list things like "Take a Shower, Work Out and Feed Kids." But I also list things like "Clean out Basement Crawlspace, Do Taxes, Get a Tattoo and Organize Photos from the last 9 Years." I find my list completely entertaining each day as I carry it around like a little secret in my purse. I take it out and blissfully cross things off as I complete them! That is why my list is so long. I LOVE to cross things off! I had a success in my day! Yay me! I did it! My day was not completely lost in phone calls, emails, mundane tasks or wandering around.

But I also find that at the end of my day, I'm still left with an awfully long list. A list that in the back of my mind still makes me feel like I failed. Which is funny, because the list is ALWAYS too long for any human being to complete in a 24 hour period. And the list has things on it that I will probably NEVER do. I like to look at the list as motivation, but I wonder why sometimes I just know, right when I write it down, that I will not complete it. I set myself up for disappointment on a daily basis. My daily victories are sometimes overshadowed by the small failures.
Don't get me wrong, I know I am not a failure, but I also know that I have a tendancy to sabatoge myself without really trying. Doing things that I know are not good for myself or my time, but I do them anyway. We choose the wrong foods, the wrong activity, the wrong company or the wrong use of our time, but deep inside I think these parts of ourselves need to be nurtured, or at least acknowleged. I'm sure this is why teenagers rebel, middle agers go through crisis and so on. We don't allow ourselves to be "naughty" or to think outside the box, or outside the norm, at least. We make choices that are not best for us, but really that deep seeded part of us doesn't really want to heal. It's not really sick!

But. As life speeds by far too fast, I'm ready to make a few more self rules: (Some might call this the I Just Turned 40 Panic List).

I'm striving to be more kind to myself.

To let myself off the hook.

To not wake up in the middle of the night and write more things on my list.

To just "let it go," perhaps pass it on to a higher power.

To play more.

To accept my failures.

To strive to do a little better each day.

To slow down and watch my children grow.

To nurture my family.

To challenge my mind and my body.

Hopefully setting myself up for everyday successes, I'll learn to forgive myself for the every day failures. I can't promise that I won't carry around my little notebook and sharpie pen, but I'm also going to try to celebrate each day's small victory.

the sport man

Over the weekend during my basketball game everyone said "you were on fire"after the game,because in the first half I had around 10 points. I also had a lot of steals and tips to Simon. We won the game 26 -8 against fourth graders. Then in soccer I scored 0 points, but my dad said I did great when I out ran the other team and got close to the goal and shot but they had a really good goalie.

Ski Break

I had the best time skiing and tubing in Copper! After lodging in our friends apartment, we were off to ski. Up the lift and to the top of the bunny slope, I started to get exited. It was my first time skiing unless you count lessons. Swoosh! jetting down the slope as fast as an airplane, I rememberd, Pizza is slow and french fry is fast. Carving a curvy long snake in the snow, I was nearing the bottom. After what seemed like hours of fun skiing, we finally went back to the apartment and settled down. Drifting slowly into a deep sleep. The very next day, we rode up the lift to the tubing hill. Once the safty rules were said, I set off to a tube. I rode down the hill many times before I was ready to do it spinning. It was a shame to leave that fun place, but I could not stay for the rest of my life. I had a great time and I hope to go back soon.
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bouncy party/brady

A few weeks ago me and Jett went to a birthday party at Jump Street. When we got there we thought the only person we'd know was the birthday girl but when we got there we knew Eric. So we played dodge ball with Eric we never got out, except when I got pegged in the face by a teenager. I just got rite back up and walked out.till the next round it was much better it was a fun party.

it's game time!

Swoosh!Over the weekend, I played at what seemed to be the Pepsi center it was sooooooooo loud in that gym. I played two basketball games.So far my teames 2-0.The first game was tough, but we won by a good, what, 40 points!The score was

44-4!The next weekend we played another good game. We won 48-6!The game felt like forever, but I got through it. So we won 2 games but the other teams played hard. I guess we will see what hapens next time, but for now, I have to wait until next game.

Game=play!

By:jett or jett